It almost never starts with theft. It starts with someone who is "just helping": opening the mail, paying the bills, using the card at the ATM because "it's easier". Then the line between helping and taking moves — slowly enough that nobody can name the day it happened.
Financial abuse is the most common form of elder abuse in Australia and the least reported. Not out of naivety: the person taking the money is almost always someone your mother loves.
1. The signs that matter
On their own they mean nothing. Together they mean a great deal.
- Withdrawals that do not match her life: regular ATM withdrawals while she barely leaves the house.
- A new enduring power of attorney or a changed will shortly after a hospital admission, a diagnosis or a death in the family.
- A new name on the account you knew nothing about.
- Unpaid bills while the Age Pension arrives every fortnight. This is the clearest signal of all: the money comes in and does not arrive.
- She avoids questions about money, or repeats sentences that are audibly not her own.
- One person screens her: answers the phone, sits in on every visit, replies on her behalf.
- Contracts she cannot explain: subscriptions, insurance, "investments", renovations.
- In residential aged care: her personal account at the home is empty, the hairdresser is never paid, clothing and glasses go missing.
2. Who it usually is
Not the scam caller — though those exist. In the great majority of cases it is a family member: a son in financial trouble, a daughter "compensating herself" for the caring, a new partner, sometimes a paid carer who was given everything.
Two Australian patterns deserve their own warning
- The "granny flat" or "inheritance impatience" arrangement. She sells her home and puts the money into a child's property on the understanding she will live there for life. There is often nothing in writing. When the relationship breaks down, or the house is sold, or a divorce intervenes, she has no home and no money.
- The RAD. A refundable accommodation deposit is a very large lump sum sitting in one place. Who arranges it, who signs, and where the refund goes later all deserve daylight.
That she protects the person doing it is loyalty, not confusion. Expect it.
3. Week one: secure, do not confront
Confronting on day one loses you the evidence. Secure first
- Bank statements for the last 12 to 24 months. While she has capacity she can request them herself.
- A simple table: date, amount, location, what happened that day. Patterns only appear on paper — for example, withdrawals always the day after the pension lands.
- Copies of every power of attorney and contract, with dates. What matters is whether they were signed before or after capacity became doubtful.
- Dated notes in her own words.
- In residential care: the statement for the money the home holds on her behalf. Providers must account for residents' funds — ask in writing.
4. The enduring power of attorney is the pressure point
An enduring power of attorney for financial matters is the most powerful document in Australian elder law and the least supervised. Once it is signed, the attorney can move money from day one, and nobody reviews it unless someone complains.
What to know
- The rules are state and territory based. An EPOA made in Queensland is not identical to one made in Victoria. Get advice where she lives. Enduring power of attorney and advance care directive explains how the documents work.
- While she has capacity she can revoke it, in writing, with the formalities her state requires — and the revocation must reach the bank and the former attorney.
- An attorney has legal duties: keep her money separate from theirs, keep records, avoid conflicts, act in her interests only. "It was going to be mine anyway" is not a defence.
- The state civil tribunal can intervene. VCAT, NCAT, QCAT, SACAT, SAT, ACAT and TASCAT can review an attorney's conduct, order them to produce accounts, revoke the appointment, and appoint an independent financial administrator — often the Public Trustee or the state trustee body. Any person with a proper interest can apply, including you. You do not need her consent.
5. Centrelink and the bank
- Services Australia nominee arrangements: if someone has been appointed to receive her pension as a nominee, that can be changed. Call Services Australia and ask what arrangements are on file — an unexpected nominee is a red flag in itself.
- Banks have financial-abuse escalation processes and staff trained under industry guidance. Say the words: "I believe my mother is being financially abused." Ask for the process, and ask for it to be recorded.
- She can set withdrawal limits and remove online access.
- Joint accounts are the most common vehicle: legally, either holder can empty them.
6. Who to call
- 1800 ELDERHelp — 1800 353 374, the national free-call number that redirects to the elder abuse helpline in her state or territory. This is the first call when you are unsure.
- Older Persons Advocacy Network (OPAN) — 1800 700 600: free, independent advocacy, including help writing complaints and sitting in on meetings.
- Aged Care Quality and Safety Commission — 1800 951 822, if money is disappearing inside a residential or home care service.
- The Public Advocate or Public Guardian in her state, and the Public Trustee for financial administration.
- Police: theft and fraud are crimes wherever they occur, including within families.
Realistically, the tribunal route usually stops the money faster than a criminal case. The two are not mutually exclusive.
7. If it is your brother
The most common case, and the bitterest. Two things help.
Separate the accusation from the remedy. You do not have to prove he is dishonest. You have to get a neutral party managing the money. The sentence that works: "I don't want any one of us carrying this alone. Let someone outside the family do it."
Expect the counter-attack: "You were never here." "You only care about the inheritance." Answer with paper — dates, amounts, statements — not with outrage.
8. Preventing it while you still can
- Sign the documents early, with a solicitor, in her state — not in a hospital corridor.
- Appoint two attorneys jointly. Four eyes prevent most of it, with no accusation implied.
- Put family property arrangements in writing, with independent advice on both sides. This is the single biggest preventable loss in Australia.
- Automate rent, insurance and the aged care fees.
- A small everyday account, the rest kept separate.
- Never hand over the card and the PIN — not even "just for this week".
For the paperwork and for the search
If there is a bigger problem behind the money — she can no longer live alone — those are two separate jobs.
Curalune Care Help (A$109) puts together, usually within 24 business hours, a shortlist of 3 to 5 homes matched to her area and care needs — with contacts, the right questions and a message ready to send.
*General information, not legal or financial advice. Admission, fees and availability are always confirmed by the providers and the responsible bodies. If someone is in immediate danger, call 000.*